My Life Changed When I Stopped Doing This One Thing
Back in 2019, I was at the height of my addiction to alcohol, however from the outside looking in, it seemed like I had it all together. I was “ticking the boxes” and achieving success in a number of areas in my life, but what you couldn’t see is how miserable I was.
Every day I grappled with a deep sense of unworthiness, a feeling of emptiness, that I thought could only be relieved by the comfort of a glass of wine. Every day, I would drink more than I wanted to and wake up the following morning with the dreadful feeling of guilt, shame and remorse.
But what if I told you, alcohol wasn’t the problem?
It was undeniable that drinking was having a negative impact on my health, my relationships and dimming the light that once grew bright inside of me. But there was something much more detrimental playing out underneath it all.
And that was BLAME.
My life changed when I finally stopped playing the blame game. I still remember the moment this happened. It was in the early hours on the 15th February 2020. Sitting in an Uber coming home from what was meant to be a couple of quiet drinks the night before, I finally realised if I wanted my life to change, I needed to change. I couldn’t continue to blame my husband, my family, my job or whatever else for the way I was feeling. For as long as I continued to blame others, I was handing over my power.
To be the change you want to see, you must be willing to get uncomfortable and grow.
And this doesn’t mean sitting around wishing things were different. I’m talking about doing the impossible, leaning into the fear and making sacrifices for your greater self.
Growth takes conscious action.
I never dreamed in a million years that making the decision to get sober would be the first domino to fall in a series of decisions that has led me to the life I live today.
As I write this, I’m sitting in Bali on holidays with my fiancé, having recently celebrated a milestone in my business. A business that I created so that I could help other women experience the same life changing transformation that I’ve had. A business that allows me to live every day in alignment with my values and purpose.
And it all started, when I stopped blaming.
xoxo Ash