New Episodes Released Each Monday
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New Episodes Released Each Monday ✨
“I truly believe that when we recover loudly, no one need suffer in silence.”
- Ash Butterss
Join Ash each week as she brings you powerful stories of adversity, hope and transformation.
Whether it’s an epic interview or one of Ash’s in demand solo episodes, each recording delivers you tools and insights to unlock your full potential and create a life that excites you.
If you’re hungry to learn and expand your mind then you’re in the right place.
This podcast is your one-stop shop for powerful strategies, raw vulnerability and the shared wisdom of those who’ve walked the path themselves.
About Behind The Smile
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About Behind The Smile ✨
I created Behind The Smile with Ash Butterss because I’m on a mission to remove the stigma around mental health, trauma and addiction.
From 2018 – 2020, I was drinking every day, stuck in a cycle of addiction yet from the outside looking in my life looked “normal.” I now know, I fell into the category of being a “high-functioning alcoholic” however, at the time, I thought I just needed to learn how to control my drinking.
I was also experiencing poor mental health and debilitating panic attacks, which I was later medicated for, but I didn’t stop drinking and so the anxiety raged on.
During this time, I didn’t know where to turn to. I knew there were programs such as AA, but I didn’t think I qualified because I didn’t think I was an alcoholic. I didn’t look like the “typical” alcoholic, and I hadn’t lost my job or my marriage, so I was at a loss. Nowhere could I find another person who looked and sounded like me, who was going through a similar experience and talking about it.
When I got sober in 2020, I knew I needed to change this. I had a deep calling to start a conversation around mental health and addiction so that people could find identification in hearing people’s stories.
We live in a society that demands perfectionism and often people are afraid to speak honestly and openly about their struggles. Yet the only way this stigma can be removed is by having the conversation!
I hope these stories offer education and comfort for anyone experiencing difficulties today. Know that you’re not alone.
Ash xo
Episode Show Notes
Take a trip through the latest episode show notes below
Episode 121. The Truth About Recovery (That No One Talks About), with Ian Cron
In this latest episode, Ash sits down with Ian Cron, a bestselling author, psychotherapist, Enneagram teacher, and Episcopal priest, to explore the power of recovery, the importance of spiritual growth, and what it really means to heal from the inside out.
Ian opens up about his decades-long journey in and out of 12-step recovery, including a relapse in 2020 after many years of sobriety. He shares the turning point that brought him back to the steps, and how going through the process with fresh eyes gave him a new understanding of addiction, spirituality, and lasting transformation.
Drawing on his latest book, The Fix, Ian reframes the 12 steps as a universal design for living, offering clarity for anyone seeking to heal broken relationships with self, others, and a higher power. Ash and Ian also discuss the connection between personality, behavior, and healing, the role of the Enneagram in understanding ourselves more deeply, and why true recovery goes far beyond just giving up a substance.
This episode is a heartfelt and intellectually rich conversation about grace, growth, and spiritual freedom, whether you identify as being in recovery or not.
Episode 120. One Decision to Change Your Entire Life, with Kate Goold
In this episode, Ash sits down with Kate Goold, a working mum of two who recently celebrated her first year alcohol-free. Kate’s journey began with chronic physical pain and three hip replacements in four years—an ordeal that left her on crutches, in and out of hospitals, and barely able to care for her children. But what began as a decision to help her body heal physically sparked something much deeper: a complete emotional and spiritual transformation.
Kate shares her experience with chronic pain, debilitating depression, and self-medicating, all while trying to maintain the appearance of having it together. She opens up about the turning point that led her to quit drinking, the unexpected grief and growth that came with that choice, and the clarity she’s found in sobriety.
Now 18 months into her alcohol-free journey, Kate is showing up for herself and her family in a way she never thought possible. She reflects on identity, boundaries, motherhood, and what it means to truly come home to yourself. Her story is a powerful reminder that healing isn’t linear, but it is possible and even one small decision can lead to a million changes.
Episode 119. From Million-Dollar Listings to a Midlife Reawakening, with Andrew Campbell
In this week’s episode, Ash sits down with Andrew Campbell, founder of Hush Property and a respected figure in Melbourne’s high-end real estate market. Known for selling luxury homes with discretion and heart, Andrew shares a side of himself few ever see—the man behind the polished exterior, and the deeply personal journey that shaped him.
Andrew opens up about losing his father at age 22, growing up with a mother living with bipolar disorder, and how work became both a coping mechanism and an addiction. From battling insecurities and being bullied at school to navigating grief, divorce, financial setbacks, and public criticism, Andrew reflects on the moments that brought him to his knees and the mindset shifts that helped him stand back up.
Now 50, and entering what he calls his “second act,” Andrew shares how cold immersion, gut health, affirmations, inner child work, and spiritual practices have helped him redefine what success truly means. This is a powerful story of vulnerability, fatherhood, and the quiet transformation that happens when someone decides to stop performing and start living.
Episode 118. Rewiring The Subconscious and Healing Your Trauma, with Katharine McLean
In this powerful episode, Ash sits down with Katharine McLean, a holistic counselor, trauma-informed mentor, and founder of The Light Becomes Her. With over 23 years of experience guiding others through healing, Katharine shares her deeply personal journey through addiction, recovery, and inner transformation.
After decades of high-functioning alcohol use and hidden drug addiction, Katharine hit rock bottom while leading mental health teams by day and battling inner chaos by night.
In this conversation, Ash and Katharine dive into the root causes of addiction, childhood trauma, and the disconnection from self that fuels destructive behaviors. Katharine opens up about how she used inner child work, subconscious reprogramming, and spiritual practices to rebuild her identity from the inside out.
This is an intimate and enlightening conversation about healing the nervous system, rewiring belief systems, and stepping into a life of authenticity, service, and grace. If you’ve ever wondered what’s possible beyond addiction, this episode will leave you inspired.